Import My Heart! - AUDITION SUBMISSIONS

[shadowglitter]

[ So, you wanna be on TV? This is where it starts. A pre-recorded message of Odin plays, him just waving excitedly in his bedroom, dressed relatively casually other than the cape and the crown he's adorned himself with. ]

Hey! So, you wanna be in love. That's cool. I get it. Me too! That's what we're all here for, right? Well, maybe not. Maybe you're here for money and attention. That's fine. I'm here for love, at least. True love. Eternal forever soulmate Level 999 Hyperblast Megabeam Ultra Maximum Dinosaur Death Gorenado Mk. III-Style True Love. Hopefully with you? Hopefully with you.

If you wanna be on my show, submit your audition tapes here. This is where your videos go! Tell me a bit about yourself. Try and make yourself sound cooler than you are, and maybe do something sweet like punch a car or do a flip. Or not. I don't care. Do it, though. PRESSURE PRESSURE PRESSURE.

And then - answer my questions! As many or as few as you want. I don't care. Live your life.

One: Why do you want to be on Import My Heart?
Two: How much experience have you had with love?
Three: If you were a weapon, what weapon would you be, and what level of enchanted and/or cursed?
Four: Oh no! A horrible evil is threatening to eviscerate your world. What role do you play in this story?
Five: Say something nice about me, please. Wait, that's not a question, hold on. What's something nice that you could say about me? Haha, nailed it.

That's it. Hit me up. Go. Wait! Final note. Um.

Signing on means you're okay with physical violence and swords and potentially death. Heads up! Haha. OKAY, GO.

Comments

[ Video ]

[vanto]

[Eli is clearly not comfortable in front of the camera, which begs the question of — why is he even doing this to begin with?

Well. That's a whole can of worms that Eli isn't touching in this interview. Nope.

He runs a hand through his hair and smiles.]

Uh so, I'm Eli — we met that one time with the dream — you know. That whole advice for sleeping has been useful by the way, so thanks.

The questions, right.

[He rubs the back of his neck.]

Why do I want to be in imPort my heart? Well, it just sounds fun, maybe relaxing? And who doesn't want to duel to the death over someone's affections. [wry smile]

I don't have any experience with, you know dating. Or love. [Eli looks thoughtful.] So maybe I'm not a good candidate for this whole thing. [Shrug.]

A weapon? Does it matter the size? Because I'd want to be an Imperial Star Destroyer, they're huge. And those turbo lasers can do some serious damage. Ask Admiral Thrawn sometime, he did this thing once and — sorry. [Eli looks sheepish.] But back to the point, yes. ISD.

Next question, uh — fight against this evil. Isn't that what most people would do?

[Eli knows he's almost at the end of this and hey, he's finally beginning to relax.]

You're a pretty nice person, Odin. Whoever gets picked or whatever — I hope you'll find someone good. I mean, good for you to date. You know.

[Oops, back to awkward.

Eli laughs trying to cover up how flustered he's getting.]

Good luck, yeah.