He takes a few seconds to try to calm the fuck down, first, while Owain is stripping off the last of his clothes. He's still hard as a rock, but at least he's starting to be able to think in full sentences. Maybe. Sort of.
Okay, very short sentences.
He lets Owain pull him in, then sits cross legged in front of him in the water. That helped mute the urgent need, at least, and he could relax a little.
His face fell, when the tattoo was revealed. He reached out, as if to touch it, but didn't quite get there. I'll have to get one, too, he thinks to himself, but he doesn't say it outloud.
He has more than enough marks already marring his skin. In some places there are scars cutting across scars that were older - a decade of warfare had taken its toll. The worst was an almost star-shaped scar in his left shoulder - an exploding arrowhead that had almost taken him down with it. But there are long cuts scattered across his skin, where a sword cut through fabric and almost through him.
He's survived. But the stories are all still there.
"... You mean with the Pledge system?" He asks, tilting his neck to let Owain get better access.
The warm water cleans the dirt and the blood and the cum, but it doesn't clear the scars on his skin, even though they're what Owain focuses on. He feels like so much more of a ghost compared to Poe - pale skin, purely unmarred, skin only touched in places the Pledge and Poe have touched him, in every sense of the word. He hesitates on the arrow scar on his shoulder and thinks of his father, dying for him. He hesitates on the long cuts of the sword, thinking of his mother.
"The Pledge system."
He takes the towel further into the water, smoothing it over Poe's stomach, wiping everything away. He hesitates, wets his lips. Looks at Poe's eyes, as he lets the towel float to the surface of the bath and slowly puts his hand around Poe's cock again.
"I feel like a person, I think." It comes out dirty and filthy, every instinct in him raking at his throat, trying to drag those thoughts back down and into him. "You did-- so much for me-- when I was willing to leave every thought in my head other than I need to serve the Captain behind me. And now I feel-- solid. Real. Because. You let me want things. Have things. Clothes. You."
He strokes Poe's cock in careful, staggering motions, slowed by the water, obviously doing what he knows feels good to him, because that's the only experience he has.
Every drop of blood that had been returned to the rest of his system immediately went straight back into his cock the second that Owain's hand found it again. His eyelids flickered, and he gripped the side of the tub with an arm, before carefully picking up the towel.
Even while Owain stroked him, he tried to slowly clean the blood off him. It was just. A bit staggered.
"That's..." He trails off because fuck, but that feels good, even if it is achingly slow, and the warm water wants to keep him relaxed. It doesn't matter. He rolls his hips toward Owain unconsciously.
"... that's because you always... were a person, Owain, it's not-- it's not a question--" He broke off again, eyes sliding shut and the towel coming to a stop on Owain's chest as his entire focus was locked on Owain's hand.
"You're the only person who sees me like that." He thinks of Holdo. It was such a minor admonishment, but it's still ringing around in his head. He lowers his voice. "Short and succinct when addressing a superior officer."
His hand falters, but not enough to make him want to stop. Another slow, steady stroke, circling Poe's head in the water before sliding back down his length. He doesn't have the bravery to do more than this, still - can't even beat Poe off as hard and as fast as he did at the wall, wouldn't be able to do that again - but he watches the rise and fall of Poe's chest, the way he stops cleaning his blood off of Owain, and it makes him harder than ever, makes him want more.
But at the same time -
But at the same time, he's afraid.
It almost slips out of his mouth, but he locks it away, just in time. Tell me I'm good. He can't ask that.
"Can you, ah..." This, at least, he can ask. "Can you-- kiss me again?"
It's not the sexiest thing, thinking of how other people treat Owain, so it brings him back into the moment, a little bit. He opens his eyes to meet the other man's, holding them.
"I'll make them see it that way, Owain," he murmured lowly. "They'll all see it, by the time I'm done."
He doesn't reply, to the request. Instead he slides his legs back around Owain, the hand with the towel moving to grip Owain's shoulder and pull himself forward, and then he's leaning in and crossing the divide between them - taking a slow, but purposeful kiss, as much as Owain will let him take.
He's still stumbling through too much of this to know how to keep a mood going. He doesn't know shit, and it goes beyond just. All he knows is he loves the way Poe makes him feel, he's starting to see the world in a different light, and he really, really wants to feel every fucking part of him.
The kiss cuts short all conversation between them, with Owain leaning into it, wanting to make things deeper but again not knowing how. He takes everything Poe gives him, going as far as to let go of his cock to just bring his wet hands to Poe's neck and focus on it - and by the time they're done, they're clean, the water's getting cold, and Owain really, really fucking wants to take this to bed.
They drain the bath, get dresed, head back to their room, and Owain takes another little stand of rebellion by walking directly by Poe's side through the trip. At first, it lasts until someone looks at him with shock, and then he staggers back a few steps and stands behind him - but something Poe does, whether consciously or unconsciously, pulls him forward again. They're still by each other's side when they get back to their room.
There are still no sheets, but he doesn't give much of a fuck. He pulls off his sweater and kicks off his boots, tugging Poe forward by the cravat. The oil lamps are halfway down, light flickering against the wall. Darker than the candlelit bathroom, but only just.
"Do you still-- are we-- still..."
He swallows. Takes a breath. Searches Poe's eyes.
"If I say-- that I want you to do what you want with me-- and that-- and that every part of my body you want-- you can have--" he hesitates. "--you know that comes from... me. Right? Not-- the pledge."
He's cleaner, at least, no longer streaked with blood and come - though he's pretty sure that isn't going to be true, for the rest of the night. The bandage around his hand is already running a little red, after he'd accidentally gotten it wet. But he really, really doesn't care, at the moment, being led deeper into the room by the cravat at his throat. He feels more comfortable than he did, before, about sliding an arm around Owain's waist and pulling him closer.
"... Yeah. I think I... get that." Twelve hours ago? He definitely wouldn't have thought that. But the last few hours have been heady as hell, and he can feel the shift.
"As long as you know that it's... it's the same, Owain, it's the same for me. I want you do take everything you want, from me, I want to give you everything you want."
Fuck. It shoots straight to his cock, the idea of-- not owning a part of Poe, necessarily, but having it. Being given this side of him, willingly, this desire, as if he deserves it, as if he's allowed to have it. He couldn't even bring his own books from the House, and here Poe was, pledging so much of himself to Owain. He nods, hard in his pants again, letting go of Poe's cravat and leaving it a little too dishevelled for any good Pledge to ignore.
There's an instinct to say, again, that he's worried Poe doesn't understand what it means, to be so loyal to someone. He spent years learning how to do it, after all. But it wouldn't be fair, it wouldn't be right, to accuse him of that after vowing that his own feelings just come from who he is rather than his training. So.
He nods. Hesitates.
"I have no idea what the fuck I want, other than, uh."
He swallows.
"The-- like."
He holds his hands up, nervous.
"Like-- like. You know. The--"
Eyes wide. He looks to the door, as if someone might overhear them. Back to Poe.
He can't help it, the grin splitting his face warmly, and unlike every other damn time he's kissed Owain - where he's waited and held back and let Owain ask, at the very least - he steps right up to him, sliding a hand around the back of his neck and pulling him down for it. It's just firm, and chaste, and he's grinning while he does it.
"Don't think about it so hard," He said as he pulled back, wetting his bottom lip, amused. "A lot of it is instinct, alright? It's okay." He reached out, fingers slipping Owain's belt free once more.
"You seemed to have some idea of what you wanted this morning, though..."
Owain brightens when he realizes what's happening, so he smiles through the whole kiss, making it awkward with too much teeth, but he can't help it, really. Wouldn't want to, even if he could. He's red-faced and shy when Poe pulls away, and he laughs, a quick and cheerful thing that rolls out of him just because he's filled with too much joy to be able to contain it.
And then Poe's slipping his belt away, talking about this morning, and he's red for an entirely different reason. The smile slips away and he watches Poe's hand, mesmerized.
"I..."
This morning. Fuck. He talks in his sleep. He's harder than he's ever been, straining so hard against his pants that it really, really fucking hurts. He might cum again right here, if he's not careful.
"That was-- you--" You were fucking me, telling me I was a good boy, treating me like a whore, and I wanted it, and I still do, wherever that part of me might come from.
He considers asking, outright, if that's what Owain wants. But he doesn't. Partly because that was... a different thing. That was from before. And sure, it's only been a few hours since things shifted, but they have shifted. Owain's behaviour makes that pretty obvious.
So instead he wet his lips. "Do you want me to show you what I like?" He asks, instead, his voice lowering to something almost like a purr, as he pulls Owain's shirt free, fingers pulling open the buttons in an easy arc.
It's all he knows. Objectifying himself, to some level. Wanting that, even now, hardwired into his head. It's why he assumes - despite everything - that when Poe offers to show him what he likes, he means the same thing. Just taking Owain, using him. He should know better, but he doesn't.
"I..."
He nods, though, eyes practically burning a hole through Poe's hand with how hard he's staring at them. When he threads his button through the hole, he stands on his tiptoes, a little, bringing the base of his cock close to Poe, needing.
"Yeah. Yeah, just-- show me. Everything. I'll do anything. With you."
He's still watching Owain's face, though, even as he pushes Owain's shirt off his shoulders and then finally goes for his fly, before pushing his pants down. He avoids touching Owain's cock, though. "Sit down," He murmurs, nodding toward the bed.
"Need to change this, first," he says, pulling away (with a teasing brush of his fingers across Owain's underwear) before he goes over to where the bandages are, quickly replacing the one on his hand. He brings another fresh bandage for Owain, holding it out to him, and then while he's distracted by that, kneels in front of him.
He wets his lips, reaching up to edge Owain's underwear off his hips and down past his knees, taking a deep breath when he finally gets a very close look at what he's dealing with. Damn.
He pushed Owain's knees further apart, sliding in between them, reaching out to take him in hand - just a single, steady stroke - before he lowered his head to press his lips to the underside of the head.
His cock pulses in his underwear as he watches Poe go, and he shifts a little, spreading his legs over the side of the bed and wondering if he should maybe, uh-- move. Get on all fours, maybe, curve his back and arch back so his ass is ready for Poe to just fucking take. He's successfully distracted when the bandage comes over, and he swallows nervously as he focuses on it, raising his hips so Poe can strip him, and he's tying the fresh bandage to his wound when--
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, holy shit, fuck--
He moves his hand, bandage loose and open and hanging off of his wrist as he spreads his legs even further. He watches Poe and he brings in a breath, sharp and loud, more like a gasp than anything else. This is-- a lot. This is too much, already, and he can see the thin river of precum flowing down his head onto Poe's lips. He bites his bottom lip and just-- watches.
"This-- this is what--" He curls his fists into the mattress. "This is what you like?"
He can't quite help the smirk, glancing up to meet Owain's eyes even as his tongue darted out, lapping up the precum.
"Mhmm," He replies, simply, raising Owain's cock a fraction so that he can press another warm kiss to the underside, and another a little lower, his lips parted and his breath warm before he slowly ran his tongue up the underside.
"Just relax," He murmured, his eyes falling back to his work as he took the head of Owain's cock between his lips and sucked on it, a slightly obscene pop sound as it pulled out of his mouth. He didn't let it stay out for long, though, pressing forward and taking Owain once more, pressing his lips further and taking him deeper --
He holds his breath, just to keep from moaning too loud and letting everyone outside the thin door hear what they're doing. He leans back, just a few inches, and he does his best to relax, but then Poe's taking him deeper and he's tensing every muscle in his body as he bucks forward into it. Fuck, fuck--
He falls back onto the bed, laying on his back, forearm over his eyes. He's worried he might not last too long, and he can already feel something slowly, slowly creeping up on him, but after cumming twice it's pretty easy to will away. He's being selfish, maybe, by letting Poe take care of him without even threading his fingers through his hair or anything, but he doesn't think of that. Just thinks about how fucking amazing his first blowjob feels.
He raises his hips, fractions at a time, trying to feel more of Poe's tongue, more of that warmth. He picks up a rhythm without even noticing he's doing it, shallow bucks into Poe's mouth pierced only by quiet gasps and desperation.
Poe doesn't seem to mind. In fact, he seems quite happy to lavish attention on him, shifing up a little straighter so that he can get the angle better. He seems, if anything, intent on undoing Owain completely - his own arousal gently left to the wayside. (Though it doesn't lessen.)
He groans when Owain starts to move, tries to relax his throat to take him as deep as he could, cheeks hollowing as his head bobbed in Owain's lap. He hummed, lowly, his hands gripping into Owain's thighs as he moved.
He stays with his back to the mattress for the next few minutes, moaning progressively louder and louder, even as he hears footsteps and dull talking through the wall he's up against. Another sign of rebellion, just for anyone listening - he's getting ruined, he's being taken care of, he's the one losing his fucking mind in a building designed to bind and restrain every part of him.
He bucks when Poe's hands rest on his thighs, his balls already tightening and drawing close to his body. More and more precum runs from his head over Poe's tongue, staining him with its taste, and he grunts when the tip of his cock slams against Poe's throat. He sits back up, tangles his hands against Poe's scalp and gently, gently holds on tight.
"F-Fuck, you've gotta stop-- you've gotta stop or I'm gonna-- I wanna do more, I wanna do more than this--"
Poe pulls back, his lips red and slightly swollen as he runs his lips over them, stopping the moment that Owain asks him to.
"You're alright," He promised, running his hands over Owain's thighs, before half way standing up just so that he could lean in against him and steal a kiss, the salt still on his lips. "You're good, just relax and let it fall back."
He keeps his hands in Poe's hair, tugging a little insistently into the kiss when Poe tries to peel back, because he's not done. He can feel the taste of himself on Poe and he wants more of it, kissing him over and over again until it's gone, and then he leans back, cock still hard and slick with Poe's saliva between them.
"... We'll do more after this? I want--" He swallows.
"Yeah. Though uh- once I'm done, I'm probably done, so... Don't worry too much about that." He was not a teenager anymore, in that respect. But he takes every kiss and then gives a few more for good measure.
He wet his lips, thinking, the gears turning behind his eyes. "Owain... I really-- don't think I want to go tonight without- either you in me, or me in you-- " he pressed another kiss to the side of Owain's lips. "...Or both. Both is good, too--"
Part of his... lessons... involved being told that he had to be ready for Poe to use him over and over again, every night, whenever he wanted to, if that's what he decided Owain's purpose was. It was unrealistic, maybe - more just a lesson in crushing Owain's will than anything else - but there's genuine surprise in his voice that maybe gives away the fact that he was told to be ready for anything.
He doesn't focus on it for long, though, thanks to the kiss. Just loses his mind in it for a moment longer, slowly sealing away another influx of this is wrong, this is wrong, this isn't how you're supposed to be that builds back over his resolve, his realizations.
"I-- want that. Either of-- those. Both of those. I just... don't... know how to..."
He's embarrassing himself, having to keep saying this. I don't know how to start things, I don't know what I want, I don't know if you want the same things I do. He's actually starting to get a bit frustrated, and he looks away from Poe, anger at himself starting to flicker onto his expression. Fuck, he's probably ruining this.
He sees the flicker of frustration, and he leans in to press his forehead to Owain's.
"It's alright. I'll show you." Though that made the decision for him. He gave Owain another firm kiss before peeling away so he could slide up onto the bed and over to the wall, sitting with his back against it and spreading his legs. He hadn't - exactly prepared, for this. No oil to hand. But.
"Gonna need to- open me up a bit, first." He raised his hand to his lips and the proceeded to slide each one into his mouth, coating them thoroughly with his own saliva, before lowering his hand back down. Making sure Owain had a good viewing angle, he carefully pressed the first of of his fingers inside of himself.
All that anger, all that frustration, so easily silenced. He watches what Poe's doing, mesmerized-- fuck, those fingers in his mouth just makes Owain throb, and it gets so much worse when Poe starts fucking himself, this bestial, animal instinct to claim running through Owain all at once.
It's conflicting, if nothing else. Nearly every time he's ever touched himself, he's thought of belonging to Poe, of being used and owned and taken, even when, in his mind, he was the one on top.
He leans in, while Poe fingers himself, and kisses the back of his palm. He mouths up to Poe's balls and takes them in, sucking hard, raising one hand and wrapping his fist around his shaft from beneath him with the same amount of light, semi-contact he had when he gave Poe that first hug from behind. He kisses down Poe's balls when he lets go, kissing down Poe's taint and back to the hand he's fucking himself with, dragging his tongue over the inside of Poe's wrist.
He keeps kissing, moving down, until he's back at his fingers - it's hard, from this position, but he runs his tongue over the outer edge of Poe's hole, whatever part he can reach. He draws his tongue back over Poe's fingers and helps keep them wet while he fingers himself, sucking on his knuckles and completely coating them in his saliva.
Even the light contact is enough to bring Poe back to full - and heavy - mast, and he leans his head back against the wall with a low groan.
In a half second he's sitting upright again, eyes locking on Owain and those lips and tongue as he moaned, "Fuck, Owain--"
He rolled his hips up, suspending them, as if that would make the angle easier, and he's gazing at Owain as if he secretly owns the keys to the universe. He slowly pulls his fingers out, thumb running along Owain's jaw.
"I want to be wet and ready for you." He whispered.
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Okay, very short sentences.
He lets Owain pull him in, then sits cross legged in front of him in the water. That helped mute the urgent need, at least, and he could relax a little.
His face fell, when the tattoo was revealed. He reached out, as if to touch it, but didn't quite get there. I'll have to get one, too, he thinks to himself, but he doesn't say it outloud.
He has more than enough marks already marring his skin. In some places there are scars cutting across scars that were older - a decade of warfare had taken its toll. The worst was an almost star-shaped scar in his left shoulder - an exploding arrowhead that had almost taken him down with it. But there are long cuts scattered across his skin, where a sword cut through fabric and almost through him.
He's survived. But the stories are all still there.
"... You mean with the Pledge system?" He asks, tilting his neck to let Owain get better access.
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"The Pledge system."
He takes the towel further into the water, smoothing it over Poe's stomach, wiping everything away. He hesitates, wets his lips. Looks at Poe's eyes, as he lets the towel float to the surface of the bath and slowly puts his hand around Poe's cock again.
"I feel like a person, I think." It comes out dirty and filthy, every instinct in him raking at his throat, trying to drag those thoughts back down and into him. "You did-- so much for me-- when I was willing to leave every thought in my head other than I need to serve the Captain behind me. And now I feel-- solid. Real. Because. You let me want things. Have things. Clothes. You."
He strokes Poe's cock in careful, staggering motions, slowed by the water, obviously doing what he knows feels good to him, because that's the only experience he has.
"This."
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Even while Owain stroked him, he tried to slowly clean the blood off him. It was just. A bit staggered.
"That's..." He trails off because fuck, but that feels good, even if it is achingly slow, and the warm water wants to keep him relaxed. It doesn't matter. He rolls his hips toward Owain unconsciously.
"... that's because you always... were a person, Owain, it's not-- it's not a question--" He broke off again, eyes sliding shut and the towel coming to a stop on Owain's chest as his entire focus was locked on Owain's hand.
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His hand falters, but not enough to make him want to stop. Another slow, steady stroke, circling Poe's head in the water before sliding back down his length. He doesn't have the bravery to do more than this, still - can't even beat Poe off as hard and as fast as he did at the wall, wouldn't be able to do that again - but he watches the rise and fall of Poe's chest, the way he stops cleaning his blood off of Owain, and it makes him harder than ever, makes him want more.
But at the same time -
But at the same time, he's afraid.
It almost slips out of his mouth, but he locks it away, just in time. Tell me I'm good. He can't ask that.
"Can you, ah..." This, at least, he can ask. "Can you-- kiss me again?"
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"I'll make them see it that way, Owain," he murmured lowly. "They'll all see it, by the time I'm done."
He doesn't reply, to the request. Instead he slides his legs back around Owain, the hand with the towel moving to grip Owain's shoulder and pull himself forward, and then he's leaning in and crossing the divide between them - taking a slow, but purposeful kiss, as much as Owain will let him take.
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The kiss cuts short all conversation between them, with Owain leaning into it, wanting to make things deeper but again not knowing how. He takes everything Poe gives him, going as far as to let go of his cock to just bring his wet hands to Poe's neck and focus on it - and by the time they're done, they're clean, the water's getting cold, and Owain really, really fucking wants to take this to bed.
They drain the bath, get dresed, head back to their room, and Owain takes another little stand of rebellion by walking directly by Poe's side through the trip. At first, it lasts until someone looks at him with shock, and then he staggers back a few steps and stands behind him - but something Poe does, whether consciously or unconsciously, pulls him forward again. They're still by each other's side when they get back to their room.
There are still no sheets, but he doesn't give much of a fuck. He pulls off his sweater and kicks off his boots, tugging Poe forward by the cravat. The oil lamps are halfway down, light flickering against the wall. Darker than the candlelit bathroom, but only just.
"Do you still-- are we-- still..."
He swallows. Takes a breath. Searches Poe's eyes.
"If I say-- that I want you to do what you want with me-- and that-- and that every part of my body you want-- you can have--" he hesitates. "--you know that comes from... me. Right? Not-- the pledge."
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"... Yeah. I think I... get that." Twelve hours ago? He definitely wouldn't have thought that. But the last few hours have been heady as hell, and he can feel the shift.
"As long as you know that it's... it's the same, Owain, it's the same for me. I want you do take everything you want, from me, I want to give you everything you want."
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There's an instinct to say, again, that he's worried Poe doesn't understand what it means, to be so loyal to someone. He spent years learning how to do it, after all. But it wouldn't be fair, it wouldn't be right, to accuse him of that after vowing that his own feelings just come from who he is rather than his training. So.
He nods. Hesitates.
"I have no idea what the fuck I want, other than, uh."
He swallows.
"The-- like."
He holds his hands up, nervous.
"Like-- like. You know. The--"
Eyes wide. He looks to the door, as if someone might overhear them. Back to Poe.
"The-- s... sex... stuff."
Fucking nailed it.
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He can't help it, the grin splitting his face warmly, and unlike every other damn time he's kissed Owain - where he's waited and held back and let Owain ask, at the very least - he steps right up to him, sliding a hand around the back of his neck and pulling him down for it. It's just firm, and chaste, and he's grinning while he does it.
"Don't think about it so hard," He said as he pulled back, wetting his bottom lip, amused. "A lot of it is instinct, alright? It's okay." He reached out, fingers slipping Owain's belt free once more.
"You seemed to have some idea of what you wanted this morning, though..."
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Owain brightens when he realizes what's happening, so he smiles through the whole kiss, making it awkward with too much teeth, but he can't help it, really. Wouldn't want to, even if he could. He's red-faced and shy when Poe pulls away, and he laughs, a quick and cheerful thing that rolls out of him just because he's filled with too much joy to be able to contain it.
And then Poe's slipping his belt away, talking about this morning, and he's red for an entirely different reason. The smile slips away and he watches Poe's hand, mesmerized.
"I..."
This morning. Fuck. He talks in his sleep. He's harder than he's ever been, straining so hard against his pants that it really, really fucking hurts. He might cum again right here, if he's not careful.
"That was-- you--" You were fucking me, telling me I was a good boy, treating me like a whore, and I wanted it, and I still do, wherever that part of me might come from.
"It-- yeah. I did. I sure... did. Have that."
Can't say it.
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So instead he wet his lips. "Do you want me to show you what I like?" He asks, instead, his voice lowering to something almost like a purr, as he pulls Owain's shirt free, fingers pulling open the buttons in an easy arc.
"Give you an idea?"
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"I..."
He nods, though, eyes practically burning a hole through Poe's hand with how hard he's staring at them. When he threads his button through the hole, he stands on his tiptoes, a little, bringing the base of his cock close to Poe, needing.
"Yeah. Yeah, just-- show me. Everything. I'll do anything. With you."
With you. Not for you.
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"Need to change this, first," he says, pulling away (with a teasing brush of his fingers across Owain's underwear) before he goes over to where the bandages are, quickly replacing the one on his hand. He brings another fresh bandage for Owain, holding it out to him, and then while he's distracted by that, kneels in front of him.
He wets his lips, reaching up to edge Owain's underwear off his hips and down past his knees, taking a deep breath when he finally gets a very close look at what he's dealing with. Damn.
He pushed Owain's knees further apart, sliding in between them, reaching out to take him in hand - just a single, steady stroke - before he lowered his head to press his lips to the underside of the head.
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Fuck. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, holy shit, fuck--
He moves his hand, bandage loose and open and hanging off of his wrist as he spreads his legs even further. He watches Poe and he brings in a breath, sharp and loud, more like a gasp than anything else. This is-- a lot. This is too much, already, and he can see the thin river of precum flowing down his head onto Poe's lips. He bites his bottom lip and just-- watches.
"This-- this is what--" He curls his fists into the mattress. "This is what you like?"
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"Mhmm," He replies, simply, raising Owain's cock a fraction so that he can press another warm kiss to the underside, and another a little lower, his lips parted and his breath warm before he slowly ran his tongue up the underside.
"Just relax," He murmured, his eyes falling back to his work as he took the head of Owain's cock between his lips and sucked on it, a slightly obscene pop sound as it pulled out of his mouth. He didn't let it stay out for long, though, pressing forward and taking Owain once more, pressing his lips further and taking him deeper --
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He falls back onto the bed, laying on his back, forearm over his eyes. He's worried he might not last too long, and he can already feel something slowly, slowly creeping up on him, but after cumming twice it's pretty easy to will away. He's being selfish, maybe, by letting Poe take care of him without even threading his fingers through his hair or anything, but he doesn't think of that. Just thinks about how fucking amazing his first blowjob feels.
He raises his hips, fractions at a time, trying to feel more of Poe's tongue, more of that warmth. He picks up a rhythm without even noticing he's doing it, shallow bucks into Poe's mouth pierced only by quiet gasps and desperation.
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He groans when Owain starts to move, tries to relax his throat to take him as deep as he could, cheeks hollowing as his head bobbed in Owain's lap. He hummed, lowly, his hands gripping into Owain's thighs as he moved.
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He bucks when Poe's hands rest on his thighs, his balls already tightening and drawing close to his body. More and more precum runs from his head over Poe's tongue, staining him with its taste, and he grunts when the tip of his cock slams against Poe's throat. He sits back up, tangles his hands against Poe's scalp and gently, gently holds on tight.
"F-Fuck, you've gotta stop-- you've gotta stop or I'm gonna-- I wanna do more, I wanna do more than this--"
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"You're alright," He promised, running his hands over Owain's thighs, before half way standing up just so that he could lean in against him and steal a kiss, the salt still on his lips. "You're good, just relax and let it fall back."
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"... We'll do more after this? I want--" He swallows.
"I really-- want to make you cum, too. So..."
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He wet his lips, thinking, the gears turning behind his eyes. "Owain... I really-- don't think I want to go tonight without- either you in me, or me in you-- " he pressed another kiss to the side of Owain's lips. "...Or both. Both is good, too--"
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Part of his... lessons... involved being told that he had to be ready for Poe to use him over and over again, every night, whenever he wanted to, if that's what he decided Owain's purpose was. It was unrealistic, maybe - more just a lesson in crushing Owain's will than anything else - but there's genuine surprise in his voice that maybe gives away the fact that he was told to be ready for anything.
He doesn't focus on it for long, though, thanks to the kiss. Just loses his mind in it for a moment longer, slowly sealing away another influx of this is wrong, this is wrong, this isn't how you're supposed to be that builds back over his resolve, his realizations.
"I-- want that. Either of-- those. Both of those. I just... don't... know how to..."
He's embarrassing himself, having to keep saying this. I don't know how to start things, I don't know what I want, I don't know if you want the same things I do. He's actually starting to get a bit frustrated, and he looks away from Poe, anger at himself starting to flicker onto his expression. Fuck, he's probably ruining this.
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"It's alright. I'll show you." Though that made the decision for him. He gave Owain another firm kiss before peeling away so he could slide up onto the bed and over to the wall, sitting with his back against it and spreading his legs. He hadn't - exactly prepared, for this. No oil to hand. But.
"Gonna need to- open me up a bit, first." He raised his hand to his lips and the proceeded to slide each one into his mouth, coating them thoroughly with his own saliva, before lowering his hand back down. Making sure Owain had a good viewing angle, he carefully pressed the first of of his fingers inside of himself.
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All that anger, all that frustration, so easily silenced. He watches what Poe's doing, mesmerized-- fuck, those fingers in his mouth just makes Owain throb, and it gets so much worse when Poe starts fucking himself, this bestial, animal instinct to claim running through Owain all at once.
It's conflicting, if nothing else. Nearly every time he's ever touched himself, he's thought of belonging to Poe, of being used and owned and taken, even when, in his mind, he was the one on top.
He leans in, while Poe fingers himself, and kisses the back of his palm. He mouths up to Poe's balls and takes them in, sucking hard, raising one hand and wrapping his fist around his shaft from beneath him with the same amount of light, semi-contact he had when he gave Poe that first hug from behind. He kisses down Poe's balls when he lets go, kissing down Poe's taint and back to the hand he's fucking himself with, dragging his tongue over the inside of Poe's wrist.
He keeps kissing, moving down, until he's back at his fingers - it's hard, from this position, but he runs his tongue over the outer edge of Poe's hole, whatever part he can reach. He draws his tongue back over Poe's fingers and helps keep them wet while he fingers himself, sucking on his knuckles and completely coating them in his saliva.
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In a half second he's sitting upright again, eyes locking on Owain and those lips and tongue as he moaned, "Fuck, Owain--"
He rolled his hips up, suspending them, as if that would make the angle easier, and he's gazing at Owain as if he secretly owns the keys to the universe. He slowly pulls his fingers out, thumb running along Owain's jaw.
"I want to be wet and ready for you." He whispered.
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