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[shadowglitter]

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Comments

[h2no]

that's literally exactly why i didn't

okay well
matt's from my world, he was like my right-hand man in team aqua, which is the team i led back home
i had a lot of feelings for him back then but we were too mutually busy to really act on it properly
anyways after the bullshit i kind of clammed up and didn't talk to him or anyone else because i was throwing such a pity party. i made him feel bad because i wouldn't respond when he reached out for help. we'd barely just started talking again back home when i was ported in.
when i got ported out that one time i went home and saw that we do actually work things out properly, but he didn't know until i told him here...

i really hurt him but we still love each other
so i'm doing my best to make sure i don't fuck up and selfishly make him miserable again

and i don't want you to try and say WELL ACTUALLY ARCHIE it was legit just me being shitty and treating him bad because i couldn't deal with my own problems properly
we've talked it out and continue to talk out literally everything so it never happens again

[shadowglitter]

I wouldn't "well actually archie" you on this.
I'm sure you're perfectly capable of being a shitty dude.
If you've been working through that with this guy, that's great! I'm proud of you. Both of you, even though I don't really know him.
Emotional stability is hard to maintain, let alone alongside another person.
And I know you're a sweet and caring guy, so I'm sure being able to reconnect with someone who meant so much do you is, like, an overwhelmingly wonderful experience for you.
Warms my heart to know you've got that going on.
You deserve the best, my dude.

Back home kinda sounds tough for you.
We haven't really talked about it beyond, um, the surface level of what you did.
Would you rather be there or here?

[h2no]

okay good because i've been told a couple times it doesn't matter and other dumb shit when it clearly does
thanks?

it is but it's of my own making
i'd rather be home
sorry, odin, i have responsibilities there that i'm ducking through no choice by being here

[shadowglitter]

I was very close to the person who (sort of directly, I guess) ended my world back home.
Forgiving them was hard, but it came naturally to me.
It would be hypocritical of me to say a good person can't do bad things when I experienced something like that on such a grand scale.

No, it's okay, I get it.
I think I'd rather be here, even though I, too, am ducking responsibilities by avoiding home.
I never realized before I came here how much I just wanted a rest, and I'm selfishly enjoying that while I can.
I would like it to last forever, but I think despite all the turmoil in so many people's homelands, I'm actually in a very small minority by thinking that.

[h2no]

that must've been hard

yeah, i kind of want it to as well
even with all the bad shit happening it's still a break from everything...
but i can't let myself get complacent
i ruined a lot of stuff back home through my hubris and intentionally avoiding my responsibilities it would be a worse crime than most of the others i committed

[shadowglitter]

I also know this guy who collects dead bugs, and I forgave him for being himself, so. You know.
I'm a many-splendoured thing.

You're a good man. I'm honored to know you.
Even if you're stuck here for... years, I believe you'll find a way to do the right thing in the time you've been given. Make amends in one way or another.
I'm sure you'll be able to face whatever retribution waits for you back home, if there's any to come your way.

[h2no]

i don't see why you'd need to forgive him unless he's killing them?

odin
please don't put me on a pedestal
while i do have a plan for what to do back home, i've still committed crimes willingly - both as a means to an end and simply for fun
i've also used and discarded people, manipulated them and generally just treated them badly
i know you said you're sure i'm capable of doing shitty things but i've done shitty things because i wanted to as well, not just out of desperation or a misguided attempt at making things better
at one brief point i did actually want to kill a lot of innocent people

[shadowglitter]

I mean,
I was just kidding. I've always loved him and his weird dead bug collection.
I just like using him as an example when talking about terrible people I know.

I also,
Don't really know what you want me to say to any of that.

[h2no]

i don't expect you to say anything
i just want you to know
so you don't put me on a pedestal

[shadowglitter]

Is that something you think I've done to you?
Not just now, but in general.

[h2no]

no, i think you're smarter than that
but i wasn't sure after that good person comment

[shadowglitter]

Okay.
Well.
You're a good person. I'm honored to know you.
If you're willing to diminish my perception of you and disregard the time and the energy I've put into getting to know you, then hey, go wild.
But I am confident in the choice I've made to respect you the way that I do.

[h2no]

i'm laying the facts on the table. what you do with them is your prerogative.

[shadowglitter]

Cool cool cool.
Thanks for showing me a basic modicum of respect that allows me the right to form my own opinions of you?

[h2no]

thanks for being you, owain