shadowglitter | ic contact

I'll get drunk with you if it falls through and she doesn't! Bro's night out. We can complain about how women suck, but in like an ironic way because neither of us are actually sexist. But also if you're not comfortable drinking with her like that, just, um, tell her? But in like a cool jokey way so you aren't called a major dweeb. Like, "That sounds like really fun but my liver's actually on strike because of how much I ruined it last night yoooooolo" that kind of thing.

oh i'm not against getting drunk but idk, you didn't know me at my party but I had to pretty much continuously drink or not move in order to stay drunk. My metabolism is fast as fuck, at least until I'm dangerously intoxicated, which isn't a chore but to pay for those drinks?? christ.

then again I never pay for anything so it wouldn't be bad. might help my karma

Peter I steal food from my friends and I haven't paid a day's rent in my life so I'm just sort of waiting to get kicked out of my house I spend every paycheck I get on stupid shit The first week I was here I bought nothing but dog treats, The second week tennis balls and the third week eggs. I will give you my whole paycheck if it will get you adequately wasted with a hot girl. I am your wingman.

what did you do with tennis balls?

Scientific experiments.

the eggs I can figure out, roughly, but dog treats?
were they for that friend who can talk to dogs
i dont get it

No, no. This other guy runs a dog palace and he said I could come and visit his dogs, so I was like, what if I spend all my money on bribing them and trick them all into liking me? Peter. It was so, so successful.

dog palace?

gdmnit there are so many dogs here I kinda want one but at the same time want none of the responsibility of taking care of another life that isn't mine bc i forget to take care of that one already

Yes. Please stop asking me stupid questions, Peter Maximoff. I COULD ADOPT YOU AND MY DOGS COULD BE YOUR BROTHER AND SISTER

I ASKED BECAUSE I WANT TO KNOW MORE, hence the stupid questions

also tempting but I've got enough human siblings atm

I honestly don't really know what he does over there. This is that guy Pucci? They gave him a place called Pucci's Poochy Palace and I think it was just to fuck with him. I am glad that they did. The tennis balls I mostly just enchanted and threw at things. Haha, ah. The mess... the mess. And oh, right. I forgot. Sorry about your weird depraved dad.

p-puccis poochy palace
god damn

but uh yeah
no need to apologize
we're all sorry about that

I wanna meet him. I'm gonna meet him and I'm gonna tell him that you got my sister pregnant so I can see what he says.

He'd probably be really happy and then disappointed you lied

plus even if he wasn't, it's not exactly his place to say shit. he left my mom before I was born & had kids across the globe by the sounds of it

Oh. WELL, THEN HE DESERVES TO BE DISAPPOINTED (NO OFFENSE I'M SURE HE'S COOL AND FINE). Are you guys, like. You don't have to answer but are you and he close or whatever?