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I would be shocked if you and Lucina failed to become close. She is literally the most perfect person to ever exist. If you are incapable of befriending her, I don't even know you? And - Leo. Just. Yeah. Try your hardest. It'll be on him, in the end. You're right. About our talk from before.

[ hesitation. ]

You wanna interview me now, then?

got it. we'll figure out the olive branch somehow
and sure, you got time?

just got a couple questions like what you're looking for?
stuff like "what catches your interest about your partner? what features stand out to you in a sexy way? (eyes, hands, etc.)"

Hands.

[ that came too fast

that's what she said ]

I like hands. And mouths. Not in, like, a weird way, but like, I like smiles and I like lips and I like people who talk a lot and do stuff with their hands. Not No weird stuff. Not weird stuff. Just moving. Them. Long fingers. And. Like biting lips and like tongue stuff. Not Not weird. Not a weird way. Not in a weird...

[ pause ]

I like eyes, too. Hair. Strong looks, basically. Someone either needs to be stupidly hot and heroic or just really vivid and singularly defining in their aesthetic for me to appreciate them. Physically. So... my... interest... is caught... by... faces. And... bodies... and... things... worn... on those bodies. Typically. When I first meet a person. Unless I talk to them over text or voice, first. Then it's their text or voice. That catches... my interest. Because it's the first thing. that I ge.t fro rm them

[delay]

Okay, so you're into a defined look - someone who is a lot to look at, whether that's blinding and conventionally good looks or something a little outside of the norm. So long as they stand out in one way or another, you can admire them.

As for features, your favorite features include a charming smile or seductive pout and you... well, you like hands. Nice hands. You can make it sexual, y'know, this is a dating show. Lmk if I can hint at it like - "And of course, Odin likes them to be good with their hands" or something.

Edited 2018-02-10 05:21 (UTC)

Yeah. People who are, like. Themselves. Unmissable.

[ A long pause. ]

Hand... stuff... is... good. What about you? Like. What are you, like. Same question.

notes taken.

I dunno, actually? Which is kinda a shitty answer if I'm making you give me your opinion so like, if I'm talking about what I'm looking for in a person? Or just what I like, I guess...

Kinda in it for the same unmissable vibe, someone who can do spontaneous shit and isn't afraid to be loud. I just can't be with someone who wants to tone me down, y'know? Like, that's the worst feeling in the world, when someone wants you to just. stop being you. makes my skin crawl

i guess i look at hips, i kinda have a thing where I feel more comfortable when I can touch the people I'm with. I dunno if it annoyed jean or not, but i just always kinda put my arm around her? boobs are unanimously good too ofc but not a dealbreaker

Oh. Yeah. I mean, if you want me to get deep and talk about emotional stuff, I can. About like... the core of what I really want. At the very least, I'll say that I don't want to be with someone quiet, either. If I'm with someone it's because I want to fully experience every fucking part of them, you know? It's insane to think of a scenario where I fall in love with someone, but only to a certain point. If I'm ever like, "hey, this part of you doesn't actually mesh that well with me, so can you tone it down?", it's like, why even be with that person? I wanna love someone's stupid annoying habits even while everyone else is rolling their eyes about it. I wanna be loved like that in turn. I wanna be with someone who makes my heart skip just 'cause they're being themselves and I'm lucky enough to be there and watch it happen. And yeah. Touch. Tactile. I was super lucky Poe was into that as much as I was.

[Another delay. Peter throws his sandwich away and just - takes a walk around the room to stretch his legs.]

That's a good angle to go at, actually. Bleeds in to some of the other questions I have... like you want this whole, encompassing love right? Where you can love the faults and have yours loved too. I think that takes a lot of understanding from both parties and a willingness to adapt. But I guess it also means finding someone who fits to you.

Do you think old relationships put a strain on new ones? Especially if the break up was bad, or difficult to navigate or are you someone who can just move on optimistically?

Yeah. Encompassing. I want what my parents had, essentially. They gave all of themselves to one another. It was just-- perfect and beautiful and they made each other who they were. They protected each other. I just want to give all of myself to someone. And, like. Be wanted? I want to be somebody. To someone. Who I can protect, and who can protect me. But, um. I don't know. I want to be wholly and completely in love with someone. I don't think I'm good at moving on, but, like. If I ever find a relationship again - and I probably won't, 'cause like, honestly, even with a show this big I don't think anyone super wants me - I'm going to be with someone who claims every thought I have. But. I'm small and petty and jealous so I'd probably be really shitty about their exes, yeah. Don't print that, though?

Off the record then - you don't think you could be with someone whose ex is still in the picture? Could you cut off old ties yourself moving forward, if you had to? Or find a compromise for both of you in the new relationship?

I don't actually have good advice on this personally, I've only ever been in - that one relationship with Jean. I've had dates or whatever, messed around, but that was the first time I fell for someone? My mom always called it puppy love and said you feel strongly for the first person, even if it's not all the way right. You find the right people after that, when you're thinking less with emotions and more with your heart or something, idk

i do know im kinda petty and jealous too (hello insecurity!) but like, idk. i think that's kinda normal, maybe?

Uhh.

[ he's in his room after a long trek back to Darkhaus, and he's changing into his new suit - all black, far more fitting, the gold accents much brighter than the champagne of the first option. he takes a while to respond, because this has so quickly become less an interview and more a serious conversation and he's not sure if he and peter have ever spoken like this before. it is weird. this whole god damn week has been weird, with peter.

he supposes it's just the atmosphere of the island. reminding him of jean. ]

It depends on how in the picture they are? If I'm with someone who doesn't love me and they're just using me as a bandaid, that would kind of suck. I can't, like. I can't do anything casual anymore? I need to feel secure in who I am with someone. And I know that's really clingy and needy and shitty because, like, I know I'm going to get caught up in my head and worry about what a burden I might be and about-- like-- all the problems I'm causing for whoever I'm with-- by being too emotionally invested. In them. But. Like. I can't do anything where I don't feel whole. Anymore. After Poe. Where I wasn't enough. I wanna be enough? I want whoever I'm with to know they're enough. Probably couldn't make them send someone away, though. Probably more likely to just collapse in on myself like a dying star of jealousy and self-hatred until I light the world on fire, just full Grima-style.

hold on 1 sec, gotta do smthn

[Ten fucking minutes later, Peter finally replies:]

sry, they have me doing this promo voice thing and i think i am losing my voice over it. there's only so many times i can say ODIN DAAAAAARK before i croak

but I think that's a fair want to have, especially after what you've gone through. Whoever that person is, you're gonna find them sooner or later and you two will be a good fit for each other. Even if it doesn't happen on this island, don't worry - ok? it'll happen.

in my experience in life there are some people who like, are magnets. for trouble, for chaos, for good things and it sounds kinda corny but i think you're kinda like a magnet for positivity. You might be sad but you still smile.

[Ahem, might've spoken to Lucina by this point. Might not've.]

you deserve great shit, odin dark. take no less.

I wish we could hang out in person. A full month of stolen glances isn't going to be great.

I kinda don't think it will? At this point. I've always been really high maintenance. Even as a friend. I always thought it would be impossible for me to find, like, more than that. And now I've had, like, months of reminders that I'm not, like. Anything? Enough. For someone. Empirically. The dude literally was all like, yeah, I'm in love with you, but I'm choosing someone else, so. Like. Fundamentally. There's something wrong. With me.

[ g o d why does it always come back to this ]

It's just hard to feel like anybody would see me the way that you do. There are four people in existence I could maybe have a future with, if the cards fell the right way. Wait, five. Two are back home. One is Poe, and, y'know. One's you. The heterosexual. And one's Foggy, and that's just because he's great and buys me drinks and yells when I make rooms made of knives. We'd be a sitcom. Imagine it.

Edited 2018-02-10 06:34 (UTC)

[Peter's still got a smile on his face from the stolen glances thing, because he's been feeling that way himself - and despite all his encouraging of Odin that everything here's gonna be great, he kind of wishes they weren't here at all. That instead they could just be chilling in his apartment on a rainy day, letting Rootbeer chase oreos around and watch Netflix or something.

He has a response half typed up when he reads the rest of what Odin's saying and takes a much longer than intended pause. The seed of something lodged in his chest expands and there's a suffocating moment of confusion and panic, his mouth dry because of how he read that. What it means? What it implies.

What it makes Peter consider, in a flashing second. What he doesn't want to confront right now, because it's too difficult and scary and daunting and you know what? Fuck that? He just carries on through:]

haha, you and i'd be a disaster don't u think?

[Shit? That wasn't. A good. Reply.]

but there's nothing wrong with you, ok? I know that's hard to believe and honestly, if the tables were turned here I'd probably be saying the same? But you'd be doing what I'm doing right now, reassuring you that you're something. To me, and to other people.

who are the 2 back home? also like, cisco seems nice - you go on a date with him here yet?

No.

[ he's not really paying attention to his replies. to this conversation as a whole, actually, starting a moment or two ago. he's just sending thoughts out through the network, half-distracted now that his assistants are busying themselves with his tie and fussing over his next appearance. he groans, loudly and internally, which the network feed picks up as hrnrnruuuauauahghghghh, a message almost sent to his entire friends list. whoops. backspace backspace.

he scrubs at his eyes and holds his tattoo while he reads peter's response with the care it deserves. ]

I mean, not really? But I get why you'd think that. Haha. Thanks, though. For having my back. I think the stress of all of this is just getting to me. I keep being scared that this is all, like-- some trick that everyone's in on except for you and me and my family, and that it's all gonna end in a big rejection again. Double down on the Odin Dark's Shitty Public Love Life meme or whatever. Ugh. Inigo's one of them - I told you about him, yeah? A little, at least. The other-- I was thinking of Severa, but she probably wouldn't be up for it. I could have fallen in love with Brady... but he hasn't seen me for six years, so. Yeah. Cisco's really fucking sweet. I haven't hit him up yet, but he made me a mix tape? It was really reassuring and-- just-- nice. I love mix tapes. And he's got THICK THIGHS, MY DUDE. THICK, THICK THIGHS.

[And like that, it's brushed aside and Peter feels a bit of relief. He read into that too much? Yeah, that's - probably it. It still feels weird, like he just ripped a scab off before it healed, so the skin is tender and stinging but he can ignore it.]

mixed tapes are my territory but ok, he's allowed. smart move to woe you, 10/10. was it a good tape?

and trust me on this odin: i will take down the entire production crew single handedly if any one of them tries to set you up for on air failure. I don't give 2 shits if that's what sold most of BB3K. I will fucking destroy them for u. there will be naught but slaughter in my wake if they try

Yeah! It was nice. He did like a cool technology thing so I could just listen to it right on my phone? It was wild. He's wild.

[ he's getting his makeup done, which he hates, because he's never allowed to just go full gothic like he wants to. peter gets a few ptbtbtptbtptbtptbts sent to him while the radio says something about how Odin keeps squirming and won't let us do his makeup and would someone please tell Debra how to get him to sit still. ]

anyway-- yeah. Thank you. I'll help. Throw them in the volcano, or something. Which is real, by the way. You, um. Got a girlfriend or anything? By the way? I haven't really, like. I mean I guess I would know. But I didn't know about Jean? You told Magnus first. Before me. And. I had to. Drag out her name. And. All that.

[The radio chatter's - not so annoying anymore, Peter actually likes it now.]

sounds sweet. share ur tunes with me later, k

and... yeah, not much going on for me in that department. after jean i kinda swore off relationships and shit and i still don't know where I stand, but I think I'm kinda less bitter and hateful about it all now. i made out with like, everyone - yourself included - at christmas and that was messy. the last person i messed around with was bela but like, just kinda for kicks.

(ur hearing this all first over mags. he only knew about jean bc... he helped me realize i was in love w/ her - whole long story, i ever tell you about? how stupid i am at realizing i have feelings for people?)

I should be utilizing your show to get laid but I'm actually finding this to be way more work than I thought it'd be. they put perfumey shit on me earlier? like dude - we're on TV ffs

[ he's said it before, that he thinks it's a mistake for peter to give up. he won't comment on that, not when he's feeling better on his own, but it warms his heart a bit to know he's giving life more of a chance on this.

though it also kind of sucks, because he called jean his best friend once and odin still thinks about that and gets kinda weird. gonna be bad when another girl shows up. ]

I totally boned Bela after space. Like a day after we got back.

[ leaves that there. laughs at the perfumey part, which pisses debra off, who fusses over him again. ]

You never told me about that. You okay to talk about it?

shit wait what are we eski-

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